Joker in Distress
by Melody Shayes
Summary: It had been just a normal heist, until Kaito had lifted the gem up to the moon. He didn't listen to Akako's advice- And now he's paying for it. The next morning, Kaito wakes up, his long hair in his eyes. Wait a minute...long hair? He was...He was..."AAHH!" he-no, she screamed. After a visit at Akako's, a cure can be made...In a week. How will the thief pull this trick off? SaguKai
1. Monday

_Beep Beep Beep Beep Beep_

Kaito groaned as his alarm woke him up with a shrill voice.

"Jeez, I just need another minute or two..."

His heists always made him tired the next day, and he burrowed deeper into the blankets.

And then his second alarm woke him up.

"BaKaito! Wake UP!" His childhood friend, Aoko, screamed with a shrill voice guaranteed to wake him up better than his alarm.

He got up, muttering a profanity under his breath... and got a mouthful of long hair in his face. Annoyed, he brushed it away-and his hand froze in midair as he did so. Long...hair?

Wait a second...He didn't have long hair. And yesterday's disguise was a 35 year old man named Kirama Oko. Who had nothing _close_ to long hair...But if Akako's warning had been...

He felt himself leaping out of bed and scrambling towards the bathroom mirror. Nope, nope, couldn't be possible- He stared at the reflection staring back at him.

A panicked, indigo-eyed girl stared back at him. She had messy, slightly ruffled hair, and her eyelashes were about a centimeter longer than they should have been. He stared at her and she stared at him. Then, trembling, Kaito raised a hand to a face. The girl in the glass did the same. And...And...He was...He was...

"AAAAAHHHHHHHH!"

From across the street, Nakamori Aoko stared at Kaito's house through her window with a slight frown. "Aoko thought she heard...a girl's scream…? But that's impossible...right?"

* * *

 **How had this happened?** Kaito was pacing around the room, biting his lip and shuffling cards faster than he could think. If he- wait, was he a she now? Or was she a he? Or- Groaning, he/she ran a hand through her hair. This was too confusing! He/She thought about the events of last night's heist.

 _"Kuroba-kun, I would advise you to skip tonight's heist. Hera's Jealousy will have a bad effect on you if you hold it up to the full moon tonight."_

 _"No way, Akako! I never skip heists-Not even if I'm sick!"_

 _Now, he stood as Kid on the rooftop, silently counting down as he peered down at the Beika Hall of Treasures entrance, laughing silently as a man in a Kid costume was pulled aside to be questioned by the police force. Did Inspector Nakamori expect him to be that stupid? There was five minutes left..._

 _Four minutes...He slipped into the famous building through a barred back door 'for Tokyo Metropolitan Police Department District 2 members' in a disguise. The owner of the disguise's identity, a 35 year old Kirama Oko, was fast asleep in an abandoned water closet._

 _Three minutes...He did a double-check with Jii to make sure that the old man was ready for his trick._

 _Two minutes...He quickly stowed a plastic capsule in his pocket as a precaution._

 _One minute...He joined the Kid Task Force group that was crowded in the vast hallway in a police officer disguise. Inspector Nakamori walked to the front, and bellowed, "We're going to catch Kid tonight!"_

 _The group roared in agreement, some casting wary looks towards the endless mass of Kid fans coming into the building._

 _5...4...3...2...1...0!_

 _"Ladies and gentleman!" He said, appearing at the front of the crowd on a stone pedestal with a burst of pink smoke. "Welcome to tonight's show!"_

 _The crowd cheered and screamed. "Kid-sama!" The fangirls screamed as he threw a rose towards them, which, in a puff of smoke, duplicated into an endless amount for them all. "Get Kid!" the old inspector roared, jabbing in the air towards the thief._

 _However with a burst of sapphire blue smoke, their outfits transformed. "In honor of Christmas..."_

 _The mob of police officers became a herd of mortified police reindeer, a group of snow policemen, a large amount of police elves with red ears, a group of trying-desperately-to-hide police ballerinas, and lastly, a Santa Nakamori Claus. "Damn you, Kid!" The inspector said, frantically checking if his normal clothes were underneath the lumpy costume (which it wasn't) with a panicked look on his face. "Oh, keibu, are you looking for..." Kid whipped out a violet-red jewel and held it in the air to look at it. The glass ceiling had a good view of the full moon, which he looked through the jewel at. 'Damn... This isn't it either...' he thought, feeling a cold sensation wash over him like a wave of water. He ignored it, telling himself that he was letting Akako get to him again._

 _"Now then, as promised, Hera's Jealousy is now mine. Now, good night!" He smirked at the Kid Task Force, who were having trouble chasing after him from their outfits. "Better luck next time, keibu."_

 _He threw down a capsule and ran off to the stairwell, planning to use his hang glider to escape. As he flew, he looked back at the building behind him, which was now surrounded by helicopters. He laughed quietly to himself as the protesting cries of his fans filled the air as the officers refused to let them leave, like at the previous heists. He wasn't that stupid to disguise as one of his own fans._

 _As he reached his home, he felt a wave of exhaustion pass over him. "Man, I had to use a capsule to get out of class today, and I didn't sleep because I was planning my heist...Might as well sleep a bit anyways."_

 _After changing into a simple gray shirt and pants, he buried himself under his covers and closed his eyes._

"Kaito! Come on! You're going to be late!"Aoko's voice broke through his thoughts from outside the door of his house.

 _'Crap! I can't let her see me like this!'_ Kaito ran out of the bathroom and into his mom's room, which he knew had many of her old clothes as well as her disguises from her time as the Phantom Lady.

"Teenage clothes...teenage clothes...Here they are! "

* * *

Just as Aoko was about to kick the door down, it opened.

"U-Um, excuse me..."

Aoki stepped back, surprised. "A-Ah..."

The person who stood in the doorway was not BaKaito. It was a girl with long, brown hair, indigo eyes mirroring Kaito's, and with a hesitant smile on her face. She was wearing a simple cotton blue dress, as well as a see-through magenta jacket. She looked nervous and confused at the same time. Aoki couldn't blame her. After all, she had just pounded on the door and screeched like a cat-anyone would have looked that way.

 _'How embarrassing...'_ she thought, turning red, thinking of something to say... Ah!

"Wait a minute! Who are you?" she asked. "Aoko's lived with Kaito for a long time, and he lived alone during that entire time. Why are you in his house in the first place?"

The girl paused for a moment, as if deciding what to say to answer that. "Well... um...Kaito's...uh...on vacation!"

Aoko stared at the girl in disbelief. "On... vacation?" What kind of reason would Kaito have to suddenly take off on vacation a week before midterms and three weeks before winter break? It made no sense whatsoever. "Um...Aoko doesn't mean to pry, but why did Kaito suddenly go on vacation? Midterms are next week on Monday-he knows perfectly well, too!"

"U-Um...I think...that...Chikage-san might have...um...dragged him along to an...an old town that knew Toichi-san to...pay their respects...um...because the...er...anniversary of their marriage was...um...tomorrow...I think?" The girl was stammering, her face red, as if flustered and shy. Aoko wondered if she had startled her a little.

"Oh...um...Nakamori Aoko...um...Aoko's name is Nakamori Aoko; Aoko lives next door to Kaito!" she said. "And...what was your name?"

The girl fidgeted with the edges of her hair. "Oh...My name is...um...Kuroba...er...Mikuya!" she said, red staining her cheeks. Aoko thought that she looked cute when she blushed. "Ok...ah!" She remembered that she had to go to school, and she checked her phone. "E-Eh?!" she shrieked. "Aoko's going to be late!" She bowed to Mikuya, who was wearing a ghost of a smile. "Aoko needs to go to school; it was very nice to meet you!" she called as she ran from the open door. As she ran hurriedly, she smiled as she thought of the blushing, quiet new girl in her childhood friend's home. "Maybe I should bake cookies for her later..." she murmured under her breath. She yelped as the school bell rang in the distance. "Oh no!" She sprinted towards the school faster than she had ever run before.

* * *

Closing the door, Kaito sighed in relief. His quick thinking had saved his life-though he had now created an extra and completely fake member of his family that Aoko would surely interrogate him about when he 'got back from his vacation'. "Speaking of which..." He glanced in dismay at a schedule lying on the ground that he had knocked over during his dash to the door. _**Friday-Heist at 9:00 PM at Beika Aquarium.**_ Definitely going to be hardly now-he was a _girl_ , for kami's sake! He couldn't just show up as he was now-he would have to knock out a **girl** that had the same chest size, height, and waist length as him! And _that_ was just tarnishing the whole 'gentleman thief' thing. He decided to see if his acrobatic ability had gotten better or worse from changing. After all, it couldn't have changed too much...right?

xKx

Minutes later, he couldn't believe how wrong he'd been. "Man, my body has no stamina now...I can't even do the three triple flips I need for the laser maze they set up in the basement all the time! How am I going to pull off this heist?"

Groaning, he flopped onto the bed and buried his head in the pillow. His newly acquired long hair tickled his arms as he did so. "This is impossible...Even Dad didn't get turned into a girl when he was looking for Pandora..." He got up and looked around the room, looking for something to do. His eyes darkened when he saw the idle laptop on the desk in the corner. "Might as well get this over with..." he said, bracing himself as he started a video call with his mom, Kuroba Chikage.

* * *

Kuroba Chikage was having a pretty average day. Her old friend in New York, Bella, had invited her over at a cafe to talk about how they were doing, and now she was lounging in Bella's living room with a cup of iced tea, laughing at an joke from school. "...and then he was screaming, 'YOU SHALL NOT PAAAAAAAAAAAAASSS!' and blocking everyone's way from the gym! Remember?" Bella fell back with a giggle, and both women laughed so hard that Bella fell off her chair. Chikage's laptop was open, showing a cute picture of Kaito performing a magic trick with Toichi. Suddenly, there was a chime from it, and on it stated: **Incoming Video Call: Kuroba Kaito: Answer or Decline?**

Chikage frowned. Wasn't Kaito supposed to be at school? Why had he brought his laptop with him? Did he even go to school at all? And if so, why was he calling her? "Hey, Bella, I've got a call on my laptop. Do you mind?" Her old friend shook her head. Nah, it's fine. I'm going to take a shower and get some sleep. I'm free the rest of the week, so you can stay as long as you want." Chikage thanked her, and turned to the computer. Picking up her mouse, she clicked **Accept**.

"Kai-chan, why are you calling okaa-san? Did something ha...ppen...?" Her voice faltered as she stared at the person on the screen.

The person was a girl with features creepily exactly the same as Kaito. The only difference was her height, her gender, and the telltale lumps on her chest. "'Kaa-san, don't say anything. Let me explain. No, you are not dreaming, and yes, I know that you only have one child who is definitely _not a girl._ I am your son, Kuroba Kaito, and I was turned into a girl by a new gem I got recently from last night's heist. Hopefully this doesn't last forever because I've seen your outfits that you got from Yukiko-san, and they have scarred my life _forever._ I am _not_ going to wear those barely-even-there skirts and shirts you have in the attic." This was spoken so fast that it took Chikage a minute to process everything that had just been said. "Ah-um..." She attempted to process the information again. "So you're Kai-chan as a girl?"

The girl on-screen looked relieved. "Yes, I am."

Chikage gasped in delight and excitement as she looked at her son with new eyes. "Oh, Kai-chan, you look _so cuuuuuuuute!_ " she squealed. "Should I board a plane over? Oh, I _must_ keep pictures of this moment! It's a once-in-a-lifetime chance! I still have some dresses from Yukiko-san, and I know that she'll lend me some more! Oh, I'm getting a flight to Japan right now!"

The female Kaito groaned. "Mo- _om_ ," she groaned. "I'm not going to wear dresses like a girl! I only _look_ like one, I don't have the _mentality_ of one!" Chikage was half-listening and half-scrolling through plane flights to Japan. "Ooh, here's a flight for 6:00 am! Kai-chan, I need to go pack! See you soon!" she sang, clicking the laptop off. She grabbed it and knocked on the bathroom door, where Bella was still taking a shower. "Hey, Bella, I've got to go. A once-in-a-lifetime opportunity has come for me to have fun with my Kai-chan! The flight's at six in the morning, so I need to go back and pack. Thanks for everything!"

Bella called, "Wait! There's a package on the dining table; think of it as a goodbye gift! Come back soon! Bye!"

"Bye, I'll send you pictures and I'll be back soon!" Chikage said.

She went down the stairs and to the dining table, where a package lay on the table. Chikage grabbed it and dumped everything in her bag. Then, picking up her coffee and her bulging bag, she opened the door and shut it behind her. "I'm going back to Japan to see my Kai-channn!" She squealed as she

* * *

Kaito woke up on his bed, still a girl. "Ugh," he said, dragging a hair through the tangled, long hair he now had as he remembered his conversation with his mother. "What have I gotten myself into this time?" he muttered to himself as he checked the time. "What the...Did I sleep that long?" At this time, everyone had probably already left school. Wait a minute.

Kaito got up, excited. That would mean that Akako was probably home...and he could tell her about his problem, and she could fix it! Simple as that, and then he wouldn't have to wear dresses that his mom and her friend had worn in the past. He dressed himself in the same outfit as this morning, and went out. He forced himself to walk so he wouldn't stand out, and walked all the way to the witch's house. He rang the bell, and the door opened, unlocked by the witch herself. "Oh. It's you. The fool who did not heed my warning once again," she commented drily. She stepped aside to let Kaito in. "Well then, come in, Kuroba-kun. Let's see what magical trouble you've gotten yourself into in this time."

* * *

After a few minutes and a drawing of his blood, Akako came back with a sadistic gleam in her eyes. It didn't hide the shadow of worry in their depths. "Well...I've got good news and bad news."

"Er...what's the good news?" Kaito prayed that this could be over with some weird spell and that the bad news weren't that bad.

"The good news is that this magic has a cure, and that there will be no side-effects when you take this cure."

He perked up. This was better news than he'd expected.

"But...this cure will not be able to be completed for a week. That means that you will stay like this for a week."

He sputtered, shocked and suddenly fearful of his life. "One... _week?_ "

Akako nodded. "I suggest canceling your next heist as well. Not that anything terrible will happen, but your physical ability-"

"-has decreased because I'm a girl," Kaito interrupted. "I know already. So there's nothing I can do until Sunday?"

"Not a single thing, I'm afraid," Akako said. "You can at least survive and make the cure worth it. That is my suggestion: Stay alive until the cure's finished. Can you do that?"

Kaito smirked. "Of course I can."

* * *

Afterwards, Akako gave him a blood-red stone and told him to go give it to a friend of hers at a certain address, which she gave to him on a piece of paper. When he had dropped it off, surprisingly without any trouble, he decided to go visit Edogawa Conan's "home", the Mouri Agency. He still had Hera's Jealousy, and wanted desperately to get it out of his hands asap.

He put it in an envelope as well as a note warning the boy not to hold it up to the moon and look at it. He didn't want the shrunken boy teenager to be a shrunken _girl_ teenager.

He rounded the corner and slipped silently across the street. Soon, he was standing in front of his destination. He put the envelope inside the mailbox carefully, so he didn't accidentally make a mark on the precious gemstone inside. However, as he turned to leave, he heard a familiar voice behind him.

"Ne, onee-chan, who's this letter from?"

 _'Shit...'_

He turned to face the chibi detective, who was smiling at him innocently with a childish tone to his voice. "Is it from, by any chance, a bastard who humiliated the entire Kid Task Force once again last night?"

Kaito groaned internally. "That's right, Tantei-kun," he said, cringing at his girly, high-pitched voice.

Conan raised an eyebrow. "What happened to you, Kid? Did you inhale helium or something?"

Kaito gasped, holding a hand to his chest. "Tantei-kun, I'm horrified that you'd think that I was that foolish to do so."

Conan rolled his eyes. "I disagree with that. I think that you would do it, and on purpose to piss off the inspector."

Kaito shrugged. "Possibly."

Conan looked him over. "I guess you're in one of your disguises again, huh? You better not use this same one on Friday. I'll know that it's you and I'll bring you to the police."

Kaito's playful grin froze on his face as he remembered the heist he was having on Friday. ' _Shoot! How am I going to do the heist?! I can't do anything in this stupid body, and it's at an aquarium! With fi-finny things! If I fall into one of those tanks during the show, I'll panic and get caught and get arrested and then_ they'll _know who i am and then-'_

"-id! Oi, Kid! Are you listening?" The detective's voice broke him out of his thoughts.

"Uh...yeah. Why wouldn't I be?" he asked.

The detective looked at him with a worried look. Before he could say anything, Kaito blurted, "IjustrememberedthatIhavesomethingtodosoIgottagonowbye!" and ran from the detective.

* * *

Kaito groaned, putting a hand on his (her?) face. "My god, what was that? Why did I do that? Geez..."

"Mikuya-chan! Aoko just finished making dinner!" Aoko called from her room window. "Would you like to eat at Aoko's place tonight? Otou-san's going to be at work until late at night again, and Aoko doesn't want to eat alone again..."

Kaito winced in sympathy. Aoko's dad often spent his nights at the police station working, or getting drunk, or brewing up plans for catching Kid. (Which, of course, never worked, but A for effort, right?) However, he had too much on his mind right now. "Ah-gomen, Nakamori-san, I need some time to move in. But maybe I can another night."

Aoko drooped a bit at that, but then perked up again. "Okay, but if you have time, stop by to see Aoko, okay?"

Kaito nodded. "I will!"

* * *

Kaito turned off the lights and got into bed. His new, long hair got into his eyes as he turned to face the wall.

 _"But...this cure will not be able to be completed for a week. That means that you will stay like this for a week."_

 _'Damn...a week, huh? I really am screwed this time...'_

* * *

 **A/N:** And that's it! This used to be on another account, but I'm going to rewrite this and try to find more time to update any fanfiction. This is still my first fanfic, so idk if it's good or if it belongs in the trash T^T


	2. Tuesday

The sun streamed into the window, blinding Kaito in the eyes as he sat up. The previous day's events came back to him, and he went back down on the bed. He was doomed. It was as simple as that. He had a limited physical ability now and limited stamina-how in the world was he going to get past the traps made especially for him? He could hardly get past them as himself! How would he-

 _Chrk. Rustle._ "Argh!"

Kaito leapt up. Wasn't that...his...

"Oh, crap," he muttered, and went to look outside the window in the guest bedroom next door. As he had suspected, there was somebody suspended in a tree, lifted up by a single loop of rope. Was that... "Oi! Tantei-kun! What the hell are you doing?! It's kind of obvious that there was a loop of rope just sitting there in the grass!" he yelled, fuming. Didn't the detective know how hard it was to reset that particular one? He'd have to replace the rope, reset the mechanism, retie the loop...

He put on a plain pink skirt and light blue shirt, which he had taken out of his mom's room. He rushed out of his room, whistling hastily for his doves. The boy could just hang there for a little longer; it wasn't her fault (she decided to address herself as a girl for now) that he had gotten caught at the time she had to feed her doves. She would hurry a little, but her doves had to be fed or else they would fuss and fly to Kaito to remind her to feed him.

"KID! KUROBA! LET ME DOWN ALREADY!"

She ignored him, throwing breadcrumbs and bird feed to his beloved pets. A newborn, Lia, flew over and latched onto her shoulder with an affectionate nip to her ear. "Good girl," she murmured to the bird. "At least you guys all still recognize me." She stood there, lost in her own thoughts.

"KID! GET! ME! DOWN!"

She jumped. "Ah. Right. Tantei-kun." She picked up a pocket knife and went out, Lia squeaking in her ear as she struggled to stay on her shoulder.

The cheeky detective glared daggers at the approaching girl. "What took you so long? And what's up with the outfit from yesterday?"

The teenager ignored him, getting to work on the rope on his ankle. The pocketknife was harder to move, and the girl glared at her weak hands. Stupid her. She couldn't even cut through a piece of rope! What could she do like this? In frustration she threw the pocketknife onto the ground and started to untie the rope with her bare hands. "Damn," she cursed as her fingers protested loudly to the tightness of the rope. It took her an extra two minutes than it normally did to untie the rope, and by then her fingers had been scratched raw. Conan yelped as he fell to the ground without warning.

"There, you're free. Now what do you want?" She flinched on the inside at how cold her voice was. "Can't you see that I'm busy?"

The detective stared at her. "Um...Kid, I think you could switch to your normal voice...because nobody's here. And you don't need to wear a girl's disguise, you perverted thief." She knew it was a joke, but it struck a bit too close to home.

The girl bit her lip to keep from yelling in frustration. Stupid detective-He couldn't solve this case, even if he wanted to. "Okay, what do you want? And how do you know where I live?"

"What do I want? You're the one who just snapped at me yesterday," the detective retorted. "Plus, _you're_ the weird one here because I got caught in one of _your_ traps that was lying there in the grass. If you're a _normal_ person, you don't just put traps in the grass and expect people to know that they're there. I came to figure out what the _hell's_ wrong with you! You literally have the _nerve_ to show up in front of the mail and drop the gem in like it's normal, and then when I find out you act like your best friend just died. Of course I'm going to track you down! Plus, I put a tracker on your sleeve yesterday, which you _obviously_ didn't notice. I tracked you down this morning after breakfast, though I told Ran that I was going to go visit Agasa Hakase's old friend with the old guy and Haibara, so you're not going to get rid of me that easily. So what's your problem, Kid? You look like you want to murder someone right now. And throw them in a lake. How about you welcome me in?"

* * *

Conan shifted uneasily as the thief put down a cup of coffee in front of him with more force than necessary. "Um...So...You're a...girl in real life?" Conan's attempt to start this conversation once more failed epicly as the thief groaned, making strangling movements with her hands. Conan had a feeling that the girl in front of him wanted to strangle him, and he sank back into the couch. "Tantei-kun, you are way, _way_ , off. You are as close to the truth as the North Pole is to the South Pole," the thief said with a forced smile.

There was a ten minute period of silence as Conan thought about everything he knew about Kid and all his (her?) heists and how he (she?) moved and spoke...

Conan leapt up. He was really hoping that his deduction was correct, because it would be extremely humiliating if his sudden horrifying idea was true. "U-Um, Kid," he stuttered. "Are you...not...a...girl?"

Kid's eyes widened, filled with shock. Conan hoped that he hadn't shocked her too much. "O-Ok, apparently not. It was just an assumption-"

Kid interrupted, her bright eyes shining excitedly. "I knew you would get it, Tantei-kun!" she squealed. A stunningly familiar smirk that closely resembled Kid's male smirk appeared on her face. "But, Tantei-kun, how would you think of such an idea?..." A small thought invaded his head as he opened his mouth. _I mean, you never had_ that _much cleavage in that area before...WHAT AM I THINKING?!_

Conan's face flushed red as a group of unwanted pictures of Ran and Sera flickered through his mind. "I-It's n-nothing important!" he sputtered, barely getting the words out.

Now there was no doubt about it. This girl was a guy, who was also Kid, who had a heist this Friday, which was in less than five days...

Conan's eyes rolled back in his head and he fell back further into the couch. Just before he ran from the room and into his dreams, he heard the thief murmur to herself. "Man, if the Heisei Holmes can't handle just this part of the problem, I wonder how he'll react when I bring in Akako's part in the story and the gem and the time the cure is done..."

* * *

Hakuba Saguru was staring at the unoccupied desk next to a window that belonged to the class prankster. His head pounded, a consequence of the capsules Kid had put in his room, where he had entered at promptly 2 a.m. after filling in reports on Kid's heist and solving a murder case, then filling in _another_ report on the murder. At that point he had been too tired to even care, and had fallen asleep on his bed in his wet clothes. When he had woken up, he had such a high fever yesterday that he skipped class and stayed at home. However, he considered himself a little better today and had forced himself to get out of bed and go to school. He had assumed that Kaito would be there and he could yell at him, but the magician never arrived.

Just before lunch, Hakuba asked Aoko if she knew where Kaito was.

"Eto...Kaito?... Ah, Aoko remembers now! Mikuya told me that he was visiting an old town with his mom, because they knew Toichi-san, to pay their respects. After all, it is Toichi-san's and Chikage-san's anniversary tomorrow. Aoko doesn't know when Bakaito will be back, though..."

That information was all Hakuba needed. "Thank you, Aoko-san. Um...Who is Mikuya?"

Aoko beamed, as if happy to talk about the mysterious girl that was somehow related to the bastard prankster that had caused _his_ cold. "Mikuya is Kaito's...cousin. She's taking care of Kaito's house, Aoko thinks. Aoko was going to ask her more, but then Aoko realized that Aoko was going to be late to school."

Hakuba nodded, processing this information carefully. Many new questions floated out of his thoughts. _Why is this...this_ Mikuya _taking care of the house? Why isn't she in school herself? Does she know if Kaito is really Kid? Could she be Kaito herself?_

His head throbbed painfully, and his theoat burned as he coughed hard, caught in yet another coughing fit. Aoko looked at the blonde, worried. "Hakuba-kun, are you okay?"

Hakuba nodded, but his vision was a little blurry. "Ah-Aoko-san, I'm going to go home early today. Could you send me our classwork and homework later?"

The girl nodded. "Aoko will send you them as soon as she gets home. Feel better, Hakuba-kun."

"Thank you," he said weakly as he shoved everything hastily in his bag and walked out of the classroom, stumbling as he did so.

 _Now,_ he thought, _I'm going to get myself some medication and pay this_ Mikuya _a visit_.

* * *

Kaito clucked disapprovingly, looking at the detective in his backyard. When she had gone upstairs to hide anything that revealed to be Kaito, the detective must have woken up. And he must have not been in a good mood, as he was attempting to murder the poor trees in his backyard with a soccer ball. By the time she had noticed that he was awake, it had been almost noon.

"Hey, Tantei-kun, do you want to go out and get lunch?" she called at the detective. "It'll be a lot more useful than murdering my innocent trees."

He scowled at her. "If you haven't forgotten, I am supposed to be with Professor Agasa, Haibara, and some random person in some place somewhere! If anyone I know sees me, which is a lot of people, they'll tell Ran, who _will_ definitely ground me forever. And that means no 'Kid Killer' competition during your heists, Kid, so-"

"Kaito. That's what you call me as a civilian. Kai- _to_. And when I'm a female, you call me Mikuya. You call me Kid at the heists. I would rather prefer you don't use it when I'm in public. Got it?" Kaito interrupted.

Conan rolled his eyes. "Whatever, Kid."

"Mi-ku- _ya_. That's what you call me." An evil smile came onto her face. "Or you could call me 'Mikuya-neechan', like you call your girlfriend 'Ran-neechan'."

Conan glared at him. "I'm only calling you that in public. Otherwise, I'll call you Mikuya."

Kaito pouted. "Fine. So what do you want for lunch?"

After thirty minutes of not agreeing on what to get for lunch, Kaito finally went out to get food. "Tantei-kun, don't go into my room while I'm gone. It's rigged to the max with pranks."

Actually, it wasn't; he just wanted to keep the detective away from the painting of his father. The last thing he needed was the kid blackmailing him with photos of the secret room.

"Okay, I won't. Are you sure you don't want sushi?"

Kaito paled slightly. "Yes, I am very sure. I am getting you curry and I'm getting myself a simple salad. And some chocolate desserts." _And absolutely none of those finny things!_

"Chocolate desserts and a salad? What kind of a lunch is that?"

"Stop protesting! Genmei's chocolate cake is the food of the angels! And so are their chocolate mochi, their chocolate ice cream, their chocolate-covered waffles, their chocolate brownies, their chocolate dorayaki, their chocolate crepes, their chocolate imagawayaki, their-"

"Ok, ok, I get it!"

A pause.

"Hey, Kuroba?"

"Hmm?"

"Do they serve anything with coffee in it? Ran doesn't let me drink any anymore."

"Yes, they have coffee jelly, coffee-"

"Just get me cold coffee jelly, pure black coffee, and the curry I wanted."

"Hai, hai~"

* * *

As Mikuya walked back to the front of her house with lunch in two bags, she noticed someone standing there. Was that... "Lady Luck has abandoned me", she muttered as she made out who it was. Hakuba Saguru stood there, staring at the windows and coughing hard.

"Um, excuse me..." Hakuba spun around to face the speaker.

Kaito shifted uneasily. "Can you move a little bit? I can't reach the gate, sorry. It's my lunch that's at fault right now. Ah... who are you again? I'm afraid Kaito isn't here if you wanted to see him."

Hakuba frowned. "Are you Kuroba Mikuya? I heard that you were watching over Kuroba's house." Then he added, "I'm Hakuba Saguru. Nice to meet you."

Kaito nodded. Then he frowned at Hakuba's appearance. The British detective was pale, his skin clammy and covered in sweat.

"Yes, I'm Mikuya," he said. '"Hakuba-san, are you ok? You look pale. Here, come inside." Kaito managed to get the gate open. Next came the door. Conan was standing on the doorstep, glaring at the thief. "What took you so long? I've been here for practically an hour!" Wordlessly Kaito handed the boy the food, one bag at a time. When that was done, Kaito turned to find that Hakuba was leaning heavily on the doorframe for support.

"Hey, are you okay? Here, lean on me." The detective's silent obedience made her worried. She guided him to a couch, one opposite of the one Conan had passed out in earlier. She felt his forehead, then yanked it away almost immediately. "Hakuba-san, you're burning up! Okay, let me get some water and some fever medicine..." She didn't need to act for this. Her concern for the detective was genuine.

Kaito grabbed the items she needed, then went to find Conan. "Hey, Tantei, can you do me a few favors? Do you know Hakuba Saguru?"

At the detective's nod, she continued. "Well, currently he's lying on my couch with an extremely high fever. I'm going to bring it down, but you need to help me when I cook something for him. I have already experienced your cooking. And that cooking will probably send Hakuba to the hospital with severe food poisoning. Do me a favor and get me a towel from the closet upstairs."

And with that Kaito grabbed a nearby thermometer as well as everything else and brought them to a table close to Hakuba. The thermometer was stuck into the blonde's mouth, announcing the temperature to be 40°C. Kaito nearly fell over. 40°C was like 104°F! What did Hakuba do to get such a scarily high fever like this? Sighing, she grabbed a towel from the stack the mini detective had quietly put beside him, and soaked it in cold water. The cloth went on Hakuba's head, and Conan was sent to get a blanket. The Brit was shivering like mad, yet sweating buckets at the same time.

* * *

It was close to eleven at night that the fever had begun to lower. Kaito looked for the shrunken detective, but found him asleep on the couch he had passed out on earlier. With a small smile on her face, she got another blanket and covered the boy with it. She yawned, leaning on the couch for some support. She was tired, too tired to even eat her precious chocolate. Oh, well. The chocolate could wait another day. Her eyes drooped, and she leaned more on the arm of the couch. She would just take a small nap...

* * *

 **A/N:** Idk, this didn't exactly turn out as I planned and hoped...Hope you enjoyed anyways!


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